Monday, October 16, 2006

10/18 column: How'd You Meet?

Anytime I’m in a group of people I’ve just met, I inevitably ask, “How did you meet your spouse?” It’s one of my favorite party games.

And let me tell you, there are some great stories out there — both serendipitous and determined.

There’s Sara, who reconnected with her high school crush at their 10-year reunion. They missed most of the reunion — but now have a three-year marriage and new baby to show for it.

There’s Missy, who met David in Florida — only to discover they’d grown up two hours apart in Minnesota. She spent the next year trying to fix him up with her single friends until she realized she wanted him to herself. They’re now expecting their second child.

There’s my own grandfather, a doctor who moved to northern Minnesota after the war. The first time he met his future wife, a baby-faced, 4-foot-11-inch sprite of a woman, my grandmother was being wheeled into surgery for an appendectomy. Grandpa saw her going in and said, loud enough for her to hear, “She looks like a child!” They’ve been married 50-plus years, so she must not hold a grudge.

Sometimes I don’t even have to ask for the stories. Sometimes they’re just handed out.

At the Golden Generations show this month, an energetic lady named Gloria announced, “I have to tell you how I met my husband sometime. It’s a good story.”

I called her at home a few days later and she didn’t disappoint.

It was 1945. Gloria was living in Minneapolis, where she’d sometimes take a bus to the Wilt Chamberlain naval base with the USO to dance with the sailors.
One night a sailor who was shipping out the next day asked for Gloria’s phone number. He wanted to call her to say goodbye.

“We had real strict rules,” says Gloria. “I told him we weren’t allowed to give our phone numbers, but that if he gave me the number at the base, I would call him to say goodbye.”

The next night, Gloria made herself a mug of Campbell’s soup, got into her dad’s flannel pajamas and made the call. The voice on the other end of the phone, she says, “was the prettiest voice I’d ever heard — with a thick southern accent.”

But when Gloria asked the southerner for the sailor she’d met the previous night, he said, “Well, there ain’t nobody here but me. Ain’t I good enough to talk to?”

“Well, I’m sure you’re good enough to talk to,” Gloria answered. “But you’re not who I want to talk to.”

“How do you know if you won’t talk to me?” the mystery man teased.

Gloria couldn’t argue. They ended up talking and laughing for the next four hours. She learned he had just arrived at the base, and that everyone else — including the sailor she’d called for — had already shipped out.

Before getting off the phone, they arranged a blind date for the next night. “We met downtown at a place where I could watch who came in,” says Gloria. “I figured if he looked OK, I’d talk to him. If not, I’d walk out the door and be gone.”

She didn’t walk. Instead, they went out that night. And the next night. And the next four nights in a row. And then they got engaged.

In two weeks time, they were married. Gloria and Lucius (Pat) Patrick will celebrate their 62nd wedding anniversary this April.

“It’s a successful, wonderful marriage,” Gloria says of the union that’s brought two sons, two daughters, 10 grandchildren and five great-grandchildren into their lives.

“But how did you know it’d be so good?” I implored. “After just two weeks?”

“We didn’t,” laughed Gloria on the phone that day. “There was really nothing to it — he was a very nice, very polite, good-looking young man. I looked at him and thought that’s what I wanted. And he looked at me and thought that’s what he wanted. And I don’t think we’ve ever had a moment of not agreeing that this was the way to go.”

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Latest column: Hurt Stories

Last week my husband, Jay, skewered his arm with a fishing spear. It wasn’t an injury of epic proportions — but it was pretty gross. He’s been delighting our boys with the account of how “a bunch of arm guts” gushed out of the hole when he pulled the spear out.

We’re used to that at my house. Gross injuries… and, more frequently, play-by-play stories of gross injuries.

The tales behind Jay’s scars have been told and retold so many times at our house that they’re legend.

The boys gather ‘round, eyes wide with anticipation, as if it’s the first time they’ve heard about the time an 11-year-old Jay ground a hole into his elbow while using his arm as a bike brake and -- wait for it -- they HAD TO SCRUB IT OUT WITH A TOOTHBRUSH!

More often than not, replays of these long-healed injuries take place at the dinner table. Yes, that’s right — stories of blood and gore are the soundtrack of my all-male-but-me family dinners.

By the time we’ve circled the table answering the perfunctory, “What was your favorite part of the day?”, the kids dive into: “Tell us about the time you were on your bike and the road came up and hit you in the face and your eyebrow was hanging down in front of your eyeball!”

And, of course, Jay obliges. Revels in every gory detail. Retells it as if it’s the first time he’s told the story. A captive audience, they hang on every word — nodding and squealing and screaming in simultaneous horror and delight.

Even my seven-year-old’s friends know the stories. “Mr. Koski,” they say when they come over to play, “Tell me about the time you got bit by a giraffe” or “Did you really get your arm stuck in that revolving door?”

But the crème de la crème of the “hurt stories,” as we call them, Jay only pulls out when we’re visiting his mother. “Did I ever tell you boys,” he begins, a mischievous smile dancing on his lips, “about the time Grandma broke my leg?”

“Oh Jay,” she admonishes. “I did not….”

Her protests just egg him on as the boys stare, open-mouthed in anticipation:
“Grandma put me in the bike seat on the back of her bike when I was just a wee little guy — no helmet, mind you — and my poor little baby leg got caught in the spokes.”

This story even has props. He keeps the tiny, thigh-high cast in his office. Someday he plans to make a lamp out of it.

Once in awhile, my boys try to involve me in the conversation. “Do you have any hurt stories, mom?” they’ll ask.

I think long and hard, of course. I want to be part of the game. I want to be looked at like the hero I know I am.

“I sprained my little toe playing kickball once,” I offer. “My mom carried me on her shoulders to the clinic for an X-ray.”

“Oh. (Blank-faced pause.) Daddy, tell us about the time you got knocked out three times on your family vacation to California.”

He launches into the one that even makes me laugh. “Well first, I got kicked by that horse. And, then, I ran right into that picnic table — the one that was level with my forehead….”

Florida & Other Schtuff

Hola! I haven't been very good at posting columns. I'll add a couple today. I hear from many of you that you're checking here for the latest, so WHY AREN'T YOU POSTING WHEN YOU'RE HERE?!

Give us your news and we'll give you ours. Deal? We'll start:

Here's news from our end:

* Jen went to Florida w/her friend Lisa at the beginning of the month and it was FABULOUS. The beaches were white, the sun was bright, and the parasailing was fantastic! Saw a shark while floating over the ocean under a parachute. Came back relaxed and rejuvenated, so everyone's happier!

* Jay's spending lots of time working on making these really great artisan-type fish decoys. You'll have to see them when you visit.

* Christian is doing a great job in first grade. We're so proud of him. He's keeping up on his homework (they have homework in first grade now, did you know this?) and is proud of himself when he does well, which is the most exciting part of it all for me (Jen).

* Bergen LOVES preschool. This is his first year, and he wishes he could go everyday. His teachers are just the quintessential preschool teachers -- very sweet and nurturing.

So that's what we're doing. Now here's a couple of things we're wondering:

* Willy and Mel: Do you have a baby?!

* Angie: Do you officially have a new job?

* Anyone "up north": We're going to be at the cabin over MEA weekend (October 21 weekend) -- care to stop in for a day or evening?

Love you all! Keep in touch!! xoxo, koskis